The Arse Cheeks 4 – Episode #027 – The Day of Dorkness

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It’s nearly time for Barbara’s big performance at the music festival as Loretta, but the crew haven’t even rehearsed! Plus they don’t have a setlist and it’s becoming doubtful she can sing anyway. What about the Doctor and Camica? Will he get her to wear a bag? Everyone’s getting prepared in their costumes and funny hats, and the excitement is building. Questions abound: Is Ian still trapped in the sewer? Will the Chicken and Pussy do the Chicken Dance to the cries of the Glastonbury Fest? Let’s see where all this leads, shall we?

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The Arse Cheeks 3 – Episode #026 – The Pride of Scarface

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Bands, roadies, pizza, gargle – these are all the buzzwords we’ve been longing to hear. Loretta adopts a tough chick image, even if her wardrobe is more feathers than leather and cone bras. Ian vouches for lotion & corduroy. (The word gargle is used twelve times in this episode, Kat counted!) The Doctor finds someone as questionable as he is, it must be love! Susan learns a festival song.

As an aside, real acid-folk bands do exist.

Thanks to Kai Owen for opening the show!

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The Arse Cheeks 2 – Episode #025 – The Worriers of Jeff

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The TARDIS team is more confused than ever. Loretta channels her inner diva. Susan learns a new song. The Battle of the Bands gets physical when Ian makes a new friend. Meanwhile, the Doctor’s in the garden picking herbs? Will Susan learn the song in time? Will Loretta ever change out of her chicken suit? Does the Doctor learn a new trick from Comeca? And who the heck is Jeff? You’ll just have to listen to find out.

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The Arse Cheeks 1 – Episode #024 – The Tampon of Ethel

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The Doctor and his TARDIS team: Susan, Ian, and Barbara get embroiled in a battle of the bands competition. However we must ask who is Loretta? Could she be the newest companion to join the TARDIS? Is she the Aztec answer to Cher, Dolly Parton, the Backstreet Boys and Britney Spears all rolled into one? Stop asking silly questions and listen to find out!

Make sure to get out your best guitar, tune it appropriately (we’ll wait) and join us!

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The Case of My Anus 6 – Episode #023 – The Case of My Anus

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The story is coming to a close. Six weeks searching for butt lube and something that may be horny goat or butt weed, we aren’t exactly sure. It’s an episode of searching: Barbara is searching for a silver statue (to melt into a silver bracelet, natch), some are searching for keys to drinks cabinets and no one is searching for Susan when she is in a box. Listen in as storylines are tied up and at least one character mentions the appeal of being tied up on the TARDIS.

If you haven’t been doing so all along, make sure to listen past the credits to hear what the improvisors say after “cut” is called. (Hint: Lots of giggling)

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The Case of My Anus 5 – Episode #022 – Ten Cents of Jeff

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The Doctor is back… did anyone else notice he was missing? While the First Doctor was off having a holiday our TARDIS team were searching for important things like epoxy, butt cream and horny goat weed. This week features exciting escapades like Susan looking for zippers, a stop off at Superdrug, questionable behavior from Gallifreyans that should know better, and plenty of innuendo.

As always, feel free to make up your own character that no one will hear but you and participate! I suggest a really tall cyclops named Max that only speaks in 9 word sentences.

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The Case of My Anus 4 – Episode #021 – The Snow Cones of Trevor

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The quest for the… butt cream continues and our time traveling heroes are forced into the snow and ice of what some would call this planet’s Canada. (It isn’t of course because no one is nearly polite enough!) They meet a mountain man with epic eyebrows who wants to trade a more suitable coat to Ian for that watch he’s wearing and poor Susan and Sabetha are left traversing bridges without adult supervision! That’s how you can tell this episode was made in the 60s, kids are allowed to galavant on strange planets that don’t even have pay phones. Join us, won’t you?

Oh and feel free to make up your own character that no one will hear but you and participate!

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The Case of My Anus 3 – Episode #020 – The Steaming Chunder

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This week the search for the, erm, cream takes Ian & Barbara to a jungle full of pig men & weirdos. Imagine Ian’s terror when he finds out that to escape Barbara has to sing a song! Bet the Dr’s glad he’s on holiday this week! Wait, what about Susan you ask? Susan loses her lust for glitter & gets ignored, but we find out what Barbara looks like in fish nets!

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The Case of My Anus 2 – Episode #019 – The Melted Shed

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Why is Barbara calling herself Loretta? Is that Spiderman? Is Ian attracted to Barbara? Was that a clip from a Blink 182 song? Our TARDIS crew is stuck in what could be a dream or may be the side effects of too much horny goatweed. Meanwhile, our improv crew can’t keep their laughter to themselves and corpse all over the place! Never before has a TV comic book character’s theme been used so much in a Doctor Who episode and wait, is that a plot developing…?

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Episode #017 – Skills with Onions

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School plays, familiar haircuts, megazord circuits… Jeff the Doctor spends time in a school and realizes the worst possible realization: children walk very slowly and K9 is far better company than his current companions.

Huge thanks to Peter Purves for the opening announcement. That’s right, Steven Taylor/Morton Dill himself/themselves (!!!!) opened the podcast!

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Queue up your DVD player! Or media file! We’ll tell you when to press play so you can watch the story along with us. You can also listen to the podcast on its own for a different, if slightly more (or less!) confusing, experience.